November 30, 2022

Shrinking Circles

Build your network, but be picky about who you let inside your innermost circle.

Building your network opens business and career opportunities and increases your chances of luck. But that shouldn't extend to your closest friends.

These are the people you trust the most. The people you can be your authentic self with. Spending time with them is enjoyable, comfortable, and easy. It comes naturally.

Why keep it small?

First, because you have to be selective. These are the relationships that you'll invest time and energy in. You have to be deliberate.

And as we grow older, we become aware of what traits we value the most. We choose only those people we respect and trust. Those with integrity. Those who can hold meaningful conversations. Those friends whom we can draw strength from. Those whose personalities and values align with ours.

As your list lengthens, your closest circle shrinks. It gets smaller in size, but it becomes deeper, weightier, stronger.

Second, because that's the only way you can deepen and strengthen relationships. Having too many friends means too many brunches and dinners, too many drinks and parties, too much time and energy spent on shallow relationships.

If you want to have deeper bonds with friends, you have to spend more time with them. And outside of work, sleep, meals, chores, and errands, there's little time left for get-togethers.

Time is valuable and nonrenewable. Who deserves yours?