Understand, But Don't Tolerate
Bullies have stories. We try to understand what turned them that way. And while a lot of times (if not always), there's a reason, it's never an excuse. We can come from a place of understanding, but we don't have to tolerate the bad behavior.
That same treatment should be applied to our own behavior.
When we find ourselves having done something that we shouldn't have, we should try to understand ourselves too. Why did we do that? Where did it come from? What are we trying to show? To prove?
When we know why we're doing things a certain way, we become more self-aware. And then we can begin to alter our behavior. We can become better.
Again, understand the cause of bad behavior, but do not tolerate it—others' and ours.
In our trying to prove one thing, we might be forgetting a more important priority: being good.